The 3 Types Of Stoner You're Guranteed To Meet

Posted on December 15 2016

Please note, that whilst not impossible, the chances of meeting a stoner goat are extremely unlikely. I know, bummer, right?

While for many, being a stoner can mean a brief stint in your formative years, however for some it can become a lifelong love affair. For both those who are in it for the long haul and those that aren’t, you will be almost guaranteed to meet at least one of these types of stoners, and it’s even likely that one of your friends will become one of these types of stoners.

The Couch Potato

This kind of stoner probably works from home or is otherwise unemployed and therefore free to chill on the sofa all day. You will become unable to tell when this person has smoked too much pot as they never really tend to move much at all. Their main goal is comfort and they will most likely be surrounded by everything they need, two litres of drink and plenty of snack, but their primary skill comes in the form of entertainment, being able to list off everything currently on Netflix like a stage actor performing his lines.

The Connoisseur

You will never have to worry about this guy stealing your weed, it’s probably not good enough, he will take a few puffs and give you his opinion, the way they’ll blow the smoke out will be akin to a wine taster spitting out the wine. He will however, revel in the idea of procuring pot for you, as a way to introduce you to more exotic flavours and to prove that he lives up to being a true pot connoisseur.

The Productive Pothead

This guy will blow your mind by his ability to smoke weed whilst continuing to be a person who functions above average. They will be generally busy all the time but when they do have down time to chill they will be not only be brilliantly funny, in a way, but also they will have the most kick-ass forms of entertainment such as the dopest hip-hop and glitch hop tunes you’ve never heard, left-field tv shows and cartoons as well as a healthy supply of more trippy and avant-garde style films. They will generally have their own weed at all times and may even sell it occasionally.



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